Here are 6 tips on communicating with others effectively, whether in the workplace or at home:

1. Really Listen

Most of us do more talking than listening. What is it that makes us more concerned about what we are going to say than what the other person is saying to us? Take the time to really listen to what people are saying, by their words, tone, and body language. If they know you are really listening to them, they will be more open and trust you with their real thoughts and feelings. Ask questions about what they are saying to encourage them to open up more. The more you really listen, the more they will open up, the more you really listen, the more they will open up… and the cycle goes on.

2. Come Alongside The Other Person

People don’t need friends who beat them up; they need friends who help them out. Being a friend means coming alongside the other person even if you don’t agree with them. It’s being there and showing support as they work through the problem. Don’t try to solve or judge their issues; just be there and let them know you care about and support them.

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3. Don’t Give Unwanted Advice

Do you have one of those friends who love to give you advice even when you don’t ask for it? Most unwanted advice is just that – unwanted. Wait until your friend asks for advice and then give it to them. If they don’t ask for your advice, don’t give it to them. Giving unwanted advice makes you seem like a know-it-all and that doesn’t make for a good friendship or good communication. Sometimes the person just wants you to listen while you are trying to fix the issue instead. A good question to ask is “Do you want me to listen or help problem solve?”. This will give you the answer on if they want advice form you on this subject. If they say “just listen”, then do that. Close your mouth and just listen. That is the best way to be helpful at that time. If you are respectful of their needs, there might come a day when they actually ask for your advice.

4. Check Your Tone And Body Language

Body language is more telling than the actual words you say. Therefore, watch your tone and body language when you are speaking. Is your tone harsh? Does your face give away your disgust when someone else is talking? Do you smile and reassure the person who is talking? Your body language says more about your feelings and thoughts than your actual words so keep that in mind the next time you have a conversation with someone. Check your body language to ensure it is consistent with your words.

5. Be Real

The best way to communicate is by being open and honest. If you are frustrated, say “I’m frustrated”. Being able to label your feelings and work through them can help you when communicating with others. If you don’t want to talk about a subject, say “I don’t want to talk about that” to let the other person know where you stand. Being able to articulate your thought s and feelings can be a big step in getting good communication with others. Little kids are great at this as they have not learned all the social nuances of how to hid their feelings and be deceptive in their communication. We could all use a trip back to being a child when understanding how to communicate more honestly.

6. It’s Not About You

I hate to say it, but communicating isn’t all about you. Communication is a two-way street and we need to remember that the other person’s thoughts and feelings are as important as our own. I know that it hard to comprehend, but we need to have that give and take when communicating with others. To have a truly good communication, there needs to be honest going both ways and a good understanding of what is being said. Asking clarifying questions and letting the other person know you are listening are great ways to enhance communication.

Try these tips to see if they enhance your communication with your co-workers and family. You might be surprised at how simple it really is to communicate with others.

I will respect the privacy of my fellow members